Little Voices/Books/Podcast

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I believe that we all spend time listening to the little voices in our minds.  Some of us probably spend more time on this than others.  With me "between jobs" or "retirement" or whatever you want to call it, I know that I am guilty of probably spending a fair amount of time on this recreational activity. 

In the past, when I take my hour walk/runs at the park or spend time in the gym, I turn on my playlist.  I have always had a great deal of country music on and have often thought while listening to Luke Bryan or Thomas Rhett, this is picture perfect love and thought to myself I have it all together this dating thing shouldn't be that difficult.  Well, I'm not having luck in this department.  My point is I have been listening to the wrong messages, the wrong voices.

I have changed this up in the last few weeks, perhaps a month now, I have been reading and listening to motivation speakers.  This started when I met a (married) man randomly at a bar and told me, after I shared some of where I'm stuck in life, he said, " I am going to send you a book, read it and follow the message".  I truly think this has if not changed my life it has definitely put me back on track.  Something has really clicked and I now am getting it.  I have been listening to the wrong messages.

The podcasts that I have been listening to have really helped. Ted Talks, Earn Your Happy, Conquer Your Mountains, have all had great encouraging and uplift messages.  I am now also learning to own my failures and downfalls.

It is not up to person to make me happy that can only come from myself, from within.  I can not expect the "you complete me" theory.  I am not going to succeed in any relationship until I am okay with myself.  I put walls up against everyone and push very wonderful people, away.  I give no one a chance because I have not been in the right frame of mind to except a good person.  I have had to discover my purpose, making good choices, making the right choices. 

I have some of the recipe for a successful life.  I feel that I do have a wonderful spiritual relationship. I have good loving parents and friends.  I have found volunteer work they I enjoy immensely.

 I need to stop and believe in myself that I am a worthy of having a person who loves me, and not take on so much guilt when I feel I don't live up to expectations of others. I want to do more listening and less speaking. I want to apologize to the people I have hurt ( you know who you are!)


















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