Counting My Blessings, Not My Tragedies

-
To look at me you'd probably see a semi normal looking woman of 53 of average weight and height in good health. That is how I see so many different people, "on the surface". But if we look a little deeper, take the time to listen and hear their stories we find that thing are much different than the outward appearances. We can live through tragic experiences and move along day by day. Sometimes it only take another tragedy to open the wound up wide. The troubles in life never happened to my body personally, but to the people I love. You would never know the pain deep in my heart without knowing me well, talking to me or reading what I write.

As a child I was always very sensitive to the hurts of others. When my siblings were punished I would feel their pain. I was a volunteer with handicapped children during everyone of my summer vacations from the age nine until I was eighteen. I loved working with kids who needed my help. I know people in our community know who "we" are when I am with my husband because he is "the guy in the wheelchair". But you would never know from just looking at me that I had an uncle and three cousin killed in a private plane accident when I was 16. You would never know just looking at me that my eldest brother was killed in a car accident at just 21 years old. You would also never know that my youngest brother committed suicide 5 years ago. I can not see if you have cancer or if you lost a child or a thousand other types of life challenging issues just by looking at you.

What we can do is listen and be there for one another. We can try to realize that when someone is not themselves they just may be going through a difficult time. With the tragedy that has just occurred in our community it opened up much pain and agony in my heart. It has brought all my heartache to the surface once again. I get through my days and then something occurs and I deeply feel the pain of what that family is and will endure because I have seen so much first hand.

What has gotten me through much of my personal heartache over the years is looking a the big picture. My family I've lost will never be back with me on this earth and my husband will never stand up and walk again but I will always have the love of the Lord to give me the strength to overcome and get through my daily day. I look at the wonderful large family, nine brother and sisters, three wonderful children, four beautiful grandchildren sixteen nieces and nephews. That we were blessed to live in a wonderful home that my husband built before his building accident. A community rich in love and support. A faith that was given to me rich in Christ love. We are blessed, we have been blessed!!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Introduction

-
Have you ever had an internal voice? No not the same as hearing voices. It's like an internal conversation with yourself. I first notice that I had this when I was a young girl watching the Walton's. Remember the one when John Boy said "Mama, sometime I just have to write". It was at this time the I realize I had to do what John Boy did, keep a notebook by the bed. I make list all the time and when something profound pops in my head I have to write it down, if I won't it will just stay there till I write it. I always have a need to figure out, WHY??? Why people do what they do is a big one. I also try to solve things. A strong faith is another part of who I am. I am in no saying that Iam perfect or a holy roller. I just have a real need to keep learning more of what the bible has to teach me. I know I will be a better more loving person by having this knowledge. I have had many trials in my life and I will share more as I go, it is going to take some ...
Read more

Creating My Backyard Bird Sanctuary

-
 Sitting on the screened in porch on my deck watching many cardinals.  This started my summer project  of my  backyard bird sanctuary.  Which then took on a like of its own. I proceeded to cut Back many weeds and honeysuckle bushes to clear a huge area, I then sprayed poison ivy and many other ground coverings. I then went to the local garden store purchased a cardinal bird feeder, gathered my St. Francis statue that I had stored at my daughter's home.  I then saw my vision coming to life. My next purchase was a garden bench and a bird bath.  I hung another bird feeder.  I was seeing all minds of animal activities, birds of all kinds but speed of  cardinals.  Of course many squirrels, a fox on a chipmonk which I save from being eaten when I opened the door. But it was the deer family who hugely entertained me.  The deer were bucks with eight points,  a momma and two spotted babies.  I started placing pavers in the dirt whi...
Read more

If This Isn't a Sign...

-
When I was in third grade and attending Catholic School, I had a nun for my teacher. She use to always tell great stories about prayer, I loved to hear her stories. They always stuck with me along with her way of praying. She believed in signs and that was how she knew her prayers were answered. She also told us that when ever she heard an ambulance she would say a "Hail Mary"; I have done that since third grade. I have planted alot of things in my yard and gardens and on the back hill I have a statue of the Blessed Virgin Mary that leads to my gazabo. Many years ago I planted many daffodils and some tulips. The daffodils came up very plentiful but to my disappointment only one red tulip would come up and bloom, year after year, the one red tulip. I always thought of this tulip as a sign that my brother Mark was okay with the Lord up in Heaven. Mark died back in 1979, in a tradgic car accident. Last year I swear I only remember the one tulip blooming. Well, I know ...
Read more